Discover Your Uniqueness, Harness It for Good

“My superpower is connecting dots other people don’t see,” said Benj Miller, founder and chairman of Syrup Marketing.

Benj is impressive. He asks the questions you know you should have asked, just after he asks them. Those deeply thought-provoking questions. The ones that get to the real problem you are trying to solve. The questions which challenge the assumptions you didn’t know you were making.

“What is my superpower?” I asked.

He said, “I don’t know you well enough to tell you that.” Then he said, “Wait.” He bowed his head and closed his eyes and went silent. It looked like he was thinking deeply. But then I realized he was praying. He was asking the Holy Spirit of God to reveal to him my superpower.

When I realized what he was doing, I closed my eyes and started praying. I was asking God to reveal His answer so Benj could tell me. He was silent for over a minute, which seemed like an eternity.

He looked me in the eyes and said, “You use your assets, experience, and wisdom to encourage others. Does that sound right to you?”

The World of Two Charlies

“It does sound right to me, but it also sounds wrong,” I said. “Your experience with me is as an encourager. Others would agree.

“But there are some I’ve worked with who would disagree. And not like disagree a little, but disagree with emotion. Sort of a ‘Hell, no. No way is that guy an encourager. He is a discourager. When I meet with him, he brings me down, way down.’” My vehemence surprised myself.

“That’s interesting because I’ve never experienced anything but encouragement from you,” he said.

Who Controls Your Power?

After leaving the Syrup offices, I kept thinking about this superpower idea. I knew he was right, but why doesn’t everyone see me this way. Why do some people see me the opposite way? Why?

There is biblical truth in Benj’s superpower concept. God made us unique and imbued us with these superpowers. They are like reflexes for us. But my experience is that they can be used for good or evil depending on who is in control.

The superpower is either controlled by God or me. When God has it, I am an encourager. When I control it, I am a discourager. God gave me the superpower to use for His glory. And God is good. He, therefore, wants me to use it for good.

But sometimes I take control. Why? Because it is difficult for me to encourage someone if I believe they are headed in the wrong direction.

When Attack Charlie Takes Over

Instead of encouraging them into what I think is the right direction, I attack. I begin asking questions. Questions which become more and more personal. If I don’t get the answers which will move the person back on the right path, I go deeper, and the questions get harder and more specific. They become downright caustic. The result of this behavior is distance, separation which leads to broken relationships.

To use the superpower I was given by God, I must be submitted to God. I don’t know what He is doing in the other person’s life. The choices they are making might be right for them even though I disagree. But who am I disagreeing with, the person I am talking to or God?

Ask yourself:

  • What superpower has God given me?
  • How do I use it for good?
  • When do I use it for evil?

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3 thoughts on “Discover Your Uniqueness, Harness It for Good

  1. Blessed by your transparency Charlie. Thank you.

    I can’t help but to ask myself when I’m self-centered, being my worst version of me, powerless against the kryptonite of pride and fear, “what is it that i’m most afraid of losing in this moment or in the future?”, and “what is it that I’m trying to prove to myself or others in this moment?”

    As I’m learning, when we are in that zone where we have nothing to lose and nothing to prove, it is there and then our God given superpower reflects most brilliantly. Not surprisingly, it’s also in that place we are most capable of being loved, and loving others.


  2. Charlie, your endearing humble, transparent modeling leadership is invaluable in this time of history making new entrepreneurship. This is an issue I and many deal with in frustration of desire to get others to understand and appreciate what we are trying to accomplish for their own good, LOL! This blog is so is very helpful, as all your excellent mentoring, but I also have some insight to help you perfect this valuable insight. Gen. Patton leaders are urgently needed as Jesus cleared the temple to usher in the disruptive transformation, but unlike Patton who was his own undoing because of this negative/evil issue you wisely teach us to avoid, and Todd and I affirm, I encourage you to not be castrated in politically correct pleasing people but remain as Apostle Paul in wise zeal. We are Biblically mandated to emulate Paul as he lived Jesus and he was not always the most popular person when he without compromise brought in disruptive undiluted truth in God’s Love. Kids do not always appreciate what parents tell them and make them do until years later :-). Thank you for “as iron sharpens iron” showing me not to change at all! But I must change to whom I share. Your heart is right for everyone to get it and be blessed and become a blessing, but in our love for others and zeal for God when we get push back, I need to follow your advice to stop and pray and ask God what He wants (my version of WWJD is WIJD: What Is Jesus Doing?). God may want us to lovingly and wisely push harder than we ever have so even we are uncomfortable (! Or, back off completely as to not suffer harm for rebuking a fool ( Or, in most cases realize we are dealing with a babe so cannot force meat when milk is needed. All true entrepreneurial leaders have to unapologetically make unpopular, hard decisions that offend some, like Jesus Who lost most of His followers, only until proven right then gained 100Xs more and better followers. Please we need your uncompromised, full on God affirmed through Benj “assets, experience, and wisdom to encourage others.”